I don’t know about you, but the world seems to be getting pretty (insert your favorite colorful word here) intense. While I like to stay informed, I also like to laugh to deal with stress. And, I need some chuckles these days.
Today, the wonderful Les Mood is here to help us laugh with an embarrassing story. Also, you can download a free book by Les on Amazon. Below the guest post, you’ll find more details about the freebie.
Take it away, Les.
There was alcohol involved. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. A number years ago I was attending a conference that was being held at the Mark Hopkins Hotel in San Francisco. I had stayed at that hotel the previous year and it was way too snooty for my tastes. I had been told about a small boutique hotel a few blocks away and decided to try it out. This establishment, which will remain nameless (because I can’t remember the name) had once been apartments so the rooms were not the typical hotel layout. My suite consisted of a sitting room, sleeping room plus the bathroom which was across from the door. The hotel boasted an antique cage elevator than ran up the center of the building in which the passengers were visible from three sides, reminiscent of the elevator in “Last Tango in Paris.”
Following the workshops on the second day of the conference I went to dinner with a group of friends; a dinner that involved drinks beforehand, wine with the meal, and more drinks after dinner. By the time a cab took me back to my hotel, much later, the world was spinning just a bit. As I went in I noticed there was no one at the front desk, only a handwritten sign saying that the manager was ill, but in an emergency could be reached at room 2XX – I was too far gone to make note of the number.
Riding up to the fourth floor I realized that the elevator was not only picturesque, it was noisy, and I was hoping it didn’t wake the other guests. I got to my room, stripped, and fell into bed.
Sometime later my bladder woke me up, reminding me of just how much I’d had to drink. I made my way down the hall and stepped through the door on my right. As the door shut behind me I realized three things: 1) The bathroom had been on the left. 2) The click I heard was me being locked out in the hallway. 3) I was naked.
I looked around for something to cover myself with, no luck. There was a small table with flowers in a vase at the end of the hall, but did it have a tablecloth? Oh hell no. Not even a doily. I was not going to ride exposed on the clackety elevator, so I tiptoed down four flights of stairs to the front desk, acutely aware of the peepholes on all the doors I passed. From the front desk I had to tiptoe back up to the manager’s room on the second floor. I knocked with what I hoped was enough sound to wake him, but not enough to get the attention of everyone else on the floor. Eventually he came to the door, looking sick as advertised. I will say this for the man, after one glance confirmed my nakedness, he kept his eyes above my shoulders. Hey, it was San Francisco – he’d probably seen worse.
He was not going to walk up to the fourth floor. We rode the noisy elevator, me plastered to the back wall pretending I was invisible. I left the light on in the bathroom the rest of the night. As I checked out the following morning, the way the desk clerk was trying to hide his smirk told me that the story of my midnight streak had been passed around the staff.
Epilogue: I am certain there was no connection, but a few months later the hotel closed and the building was torn down. Nope, no connection at all.
by Les Mood
Available in Kindle Unlimited
Lou did not want to go to the New Year’s Eve party, but her sister Sheila bullied her into it. She was determined not to enjoy herself. Then she met Cyn. They talked. They flirted. They danced. They kissed – or at least Cyn kissed her. Lou couldn’t understand why the woman kept apologizing for the kisses.
Cyn got a little drunk New Year’s Eve and somehow ended up kissing her co-worker’s sister. Several times. She apologized for the kisses and hoped Lou wouldn’t hold them against her. She was relieved when Sheila told her Lou wanted to see her again. Their first real date turned epic when they were caught in a Nebraska ice storm and ended up spending the night at Cyn’s apartment. There were unicorns involved. And more kissing.
Even though Lou had never dated a woman before, her mother thought it was a wonderful idea. Even though Cyn had always dated women, her mother thought it was a terrible idea. Then Cyn’s boss ordered them not to date.
MEET THE AUTHOR
I learned to read at age four, and have devoured book ever since. After spending nineteen frigid winters in Nebraska, I moved to Arkansas a few years ago. It was here that I read my first lesbian romance novel and was immediately hooked. There is something magical in stories about two women falling in love. In 2019 I graduated from reader to author.
CONNECT WITH LES MOOD
Thanks so much for stopping by today.
On a good note, you’ve most likely reached the peak for embarrassing moments, so you’re all good to go from here! 🙂
This is all kinds of magical. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.